TREASURE!

they might say that being an eldest is tough as it encompasses the truth of being slave with much responsibities or commonly mistaken as a burden in one's life,,,,
before yes! but not at all!
should i say this as a blessing in disguise!...
at first, i thought being an eldest will eat u up as pride kills human...
neverthless, being someone as can stand as one of the frameworks of a big family is such a treasure no matter how strong/responsible/ wEak/immature person u are!
being an eldest made me:
find hope in every pain....
find sunshine in every rainfall...
find courage in every problem...
whatever u become is the result of one's choice whether requires taking risks or going with the flow or being easy-go-lucky...
we all have contradicting or at times has same perspectives in life
but one thing i may say as sure....
that my being eldest is like politics which tastes like "sh..Ts" as the unending corruption or evolve as the figure of freedom...
freedom....freewill...a good choice!
imagine being the strength of your weak mother and the reasonable critic of your insensitive seemingly dependent father....
we all learn from each other....
learning from each other's mistake and rejoicing in one's success big or small!=)
whatever this may lead me still i count this as my noble role and i will always be proud....
always see the beauty of your family's presence....
nevertheless, i always thank GOD 4 giving me such wonderful people in my life-my family!
i may at times hate the worries but NEVER will i leave them hanging...
imagine me as the plant that needs his roots to live-that's how my family means to me...i also owe this earthly life to them!
i can cry..laugh..live...sacrifice and rejoice for them!=)

>>>marj

PATIENTLY...

though my heart is sleeping for years STILL

i just don't hurry love...

i actually miss the gift of being into a relationship but not my priority these days...

i strongly believe that each thing will fall into places at the right time...

in due time i still believe that one day in a rainy sky that guy will be mine....

who is he?? that i don't know: where he lives? what are his likes and dislikes in some aspects? his strengths and weaknesses? other stuff about him?

'coz finding true love maybe difficult to find especially if we tend to be idealistic...

nevertheless, i also believe that love will just come when u didn't or least expect it....

saying yes to a man can be attached on questioning one's mind will he take care of my heart or he will just break it like what my ex did or will my ex make it whole again...?!

it might be so true that the best thing of being broken is the time when you were totally healed from pain...

just step up and you'll find your own way to the right match....

i don't care how long it takes for this fate to bring my heart to its glowy state again...

if that man will come,i will be very blessed

but if not,well still same feelings..

i guess what matters is you enjoyed every little blessing and learned from every mistake with or without that significant other or special person....

each thing in this earthly life namely wonderful family, reliable friends, supportive officemates and reasonable critics can be all so SPECIAL....

i still thank my being SINGLE ....

anyway it's just about being PATIENT.....

>>>marj

At LaSt!

Now I don’t even miss you…

nor feel or felt the excitement when i’m with you…

it might be because of letting me feel that’s ought to be done….=)

well i’m not blaming you ‘coz it’s not your fault nor my fault…

i actually would like to say thank you….

now i have a peace of mind!

GOD BLESS u!=)

one thing I’ve learned- we can still be happy even if our hearts are not owned by special someone same as we owned one!=)

just enjoy life! everything has a perfect timing with the one truly meant for us…=)

>>>marj

IRONIC DECISION!

..After 5 months we met again with our close friends in college....
I felt the excitement of seeing you yet doubting the real you...
You're always with your mask ; leaving blank images to the people who knew you....
When I saw you with my two very eyes feeling every puff of smoke I began to ask , is that the real you??
I don't want to be judgmental 'coz "smoking doesn't make you less as a person per se" but i wished to see you realize the beauty of staying away from that vice... but it's your choice... that's you....
You've changed a lot same as I do...
Reality strikes me with the wink of an eye that I miss the old you but amazed of the new you- not with your vice but the eagerness to excel with your passion and long-term goals in life....
When we're left alone, I thought that' s the chance of asking unanswered questions but you never tried to ask a single question nor clarification that may pertain that you might care...
I..........
wished to personally say sorry for all the times I also became immature..
wished for you to say personally that you didn't feel same way as I do to directly lessen the pain...
wished to tell you how much hurt that were poured unto me every time you've taken my efforts for granted as if my feelings didn't matter to you ...
wished to slap your face for not being so frank to me but don't have the right to hurt you...
wished to say my feelings for you never ceased as you wished to have it ended...
wished to embrace you and whisper in your ears--THANK YOU 4 being part of my heart that once you were mine,,,
on the contrary, such funny thoughts to remember that we were together only for more than 3 weeks then but what matters is- we've been good friends more than 4 years up to present tested through time....
I guess this solitary feelings might end by saying thank you and I will never regret that you'll always be special...
with the gestures you've shown .. I can feel that we cannot be together,.. you always make me feel that I can't be part of your future plans nor you won't allow me to be there if you need someone to lean on and celebrating your success in life.....
But please don't think that I was never happy for you...
YOU aren't right if you think that I never wished for you to find the woman that will fill your heart with much gladness and contentment that you didn't see nor find in me before till now...
it's just fine I know I will be alright...
it's a matter of time... time will be so fleeting that one day I'll get over you and you'll be happy for me too...
you were wrong when you thought I already gave my heart to mr."E ... ..
you were wrong when you thought that I already gave you up...
but I guess these aren't right to continue if I'll be into one-sided love...
It can be so wrong to fight for something not fighting for,,,
I did my best to let you know how much you mean to me but it wasn't enough for you to stay away as you being numb and insensitive.....
THE ART OF LETTING GO--- will be my answer to never expect for anything in return especially never assume for the things that aren't meant to happen,,,,
this isn't goodbye 'coz I'll always stay as your true friend who will be giving unconditional love,,,,a friend who will be more than a lover ,,,a friend who will always be there supporting you as time goes by ,
If i will see you in the aisle with your special girl I'll be very happy for you; though it might hurt still acceptance is the best way for me to let you go far from my reach,,.
every tear that will fall from my eyes will always be a reminder that loving you is a gift! =)
opening my heart for something new.... for another history of my heart to fall in love is a must; it might not be you in the future,.,..still it will always be you that will remind me that true love is not about happy ending but having and treasuring the gift that once in my past i feel in love--this will be me saying thank you from the future perspective....
thank you for allowing me to love you,,,,
but never pity me please...
'coz one day this will be over i know i can....=)

>>> marj

TWIRL of CURSING TIME!

It's been a long time I haven't seen you....
Everytime I curse time of seeing you, the more denial I got of pretending I hate you nor don't miss you at all.
I've decided to stay away from you though our world seems so near because it paved much realizations for me to believe that not all fairy tales do come true...
You're just near my window but you've decided first to close the door between us that made me so much penetrated with your mysterious shadows...such a poignant truth!
Someone asked me if all these blogs were caused by only one person I then said yes but he will never know that he's also the reason for all these...
You ..two... made me so preoccupied with much delusions in life....
Until I found the reason to smile....
that life doesn't and will not end up to a single stormy night since it unexpectedly bring back the pot of gold of searching real happiness....
For those who forget to realize others' worth...
For those who played so unfair in the game of life...someday somehow you'll find your reason and desire for you to have your own time machine..
---remember that past might strikes back like lightning---
This world made me so much vulnerable as a human yet it aid me to be what I don't want to become and be someone who is far from being me....
In the course of time, we will never succeed if we're always afraid of making changes in our lives....
As saying goes that ...
“The doors
we open and close each day decide the lives we live.”
considering that
“Life can either be accepted or changed. If it is not accepted, it must be changed. If it cannot be changed, then it must be accepted.”

>>>marj

ANOTHER HISTORY!

After 26 years, now we all witness another pain and glory of Philippine History…
Losing a strong and charismatic political figure such as Pres.Corazon Aquino can be an inspiring reminder to all Filipinos pondering that our nation deserves only the BEST that we could give ; that is we love being one no matter what and we always should be..
From all walks of life came to give further respect to her…understanding that though everything ends, there’s always a reason to celebrate that she will always be the “MOTHER of Philippine Democracy”!
It isn’t always define that DEATH is a reason to grief…partly yes! but now connotes unity and a remarkable part of Phil. history same as during the death of NINOY, such a great hero we’ll always remember and be proud of!
I never thought that we can embody the sorrow of losing her and we never thought that we could cry as her own family even only watching the television..
DARE to BE INSENSTIVE if you’re NOT a Filipino
yeT
DARE to be SENSITIVE to what our NATION truly deserves same as what Pres.CORY sacrificed and gave to our country she mostly love!
WE should always learn the value … the love and respect to Pres.Aquino…we THANK YOU!

>>>>marj

SONA 2009!

The SONA (State of the NAtion Address) 2009 by PGMA is not the only yet the best SONa she ever delivered….Mind your own thoughts and opinions because this world is collaborated with rational and dull minds! Just stand in line where you belong!
Critics may outnumber the supporters but the reigning president will always be the stong president within the course of history ! I guess this is not about clinging to who are pro- and anti- gloria … this is about who is or who are doing the right thing, isn’t it??!
PGMA may have all the accumulated and anticipated flaws but her critics may also have their own respected interests to throw back that dark allegations to their selves.
We all have our own opinions. Respect those that are not acccording to yours for you aren’t a dictator who persuades nor challenge the power of DEMOCRACY !
This NATION isn’t about saying IT’S YOU but it’s more on about saying IT’s US !!! and This Nation deserves What is JUST and Right!
>>>marj

VOID!

i feel like missing you…
i feel like drawn with your shadows and love…
i feel like keeping you always locked in my heart.. in mind… in soul….
where are you when i’m in ache??!
where are you when i want to share the beauty of this earthly life??!!

these days… you left me all alone with all these realizations that you’re not worth the wait ‘coz if you are then someday..somehow still you’ll find your own simple ways that despite you being into your new world now you’ll still find your way back to me and I’ll be a part of you…

where are your promises of being together no matter what?!
where are your promises that despite the changes in our lives you’ll still be my shield from sorrow and in tears….well, will you stay or go far away from my reach…
you better not see me….you better not come back if you’ll only wished to crush my heart and bury it alive and died as the rotten fruit..

.I can live without your presence same as you do to me…
but if you won’t then tell me and I’ll still choose to stay….
>>>marj

FEELS Like!

what u see in me is really the real me ‘coz i hate pretensions! i maybe a pretender of my feelings but not to my personality! i loved to love and 2b loved in return but if you’ll become my critic then be my guest if that’s how u love me!=)
>>>marj

CHANGE IN ME!

I’m just simply within the ground of always realizing the beauty of every sacrifice that turns out to be the ultimate happiness that I have now… simply experiencing the zenith of being me…
LEARN HOW TO BE FREAK AT SOME POSITIVE POINT ’coz we don’t have to stay weak.. don’t be too serious and be stagnant in life ‘coz life goes on and life rocks!=)
keep goin’!… aim high as long as u can reach them….realizing that everything is possible with the help of passion and motivation!=)
GOD BLESS…

>>>marj

INTERTWINED

why some… forget their old friends just because they don’t need them?;why? simply because their lives eventually turned out right nowadays?
why some…uncontrollably cast away pain to those who cherished them and loved them?;why? simply to avoid hurt… yet come to think of it… you can never avoid something uncontrollable by moving too far!


you! you ought to embrace the beauty of the mingled zest of life- old and new….
we don’t have to sacrifice old friends simply because you found new pals to rely on…….
you can have both…cherish both.. be sensitive!

>>> marj

WHY?

“As Part Of You Has Grown In Me,Together Forever Shall We Be,Never Apart Maybe In DistanceBut Not In Heart.
The stupidest mistake in lifeis thinking the one who hurt you the most,won’t hurt you again.”

>>>marj

LOST LOVE

“To be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dreamed.”…I love him but can’t have him…
The worst thing is holding on to someone who doesn’t want to be held on to.

>>>marj